Fevers and Firsts and NOT being alone

It's 1:50pm and my eyelids are heavy as I listen to the heavy sleep of Tyson beside me on the couch.  Between blazing wild fires in the mountains just miles from our home and a brown-eyed boy with a fever, last night was rather long.  No complaints.  Just offering continued prayers for more rain (Job 5:10) and firefighters who are still working, despite inevitable exhaustion and risk.  The night hours gave me time to ponder and pray over so many things that have been newly revealed to my eyes and heart, all while holding a flaming hot a sweet boy with a fever.  There are so many firsts in our lives in these days... I try to remember them all to share with you, but it feels impossible.  There are multiple ones each day.  While they are fresh on my mind, I will share with you the past 24 hours.
All the kids were out of school yesterday, so I decided to surprise them and have our backdoor neighbor, Camden, come and stay with us all day.  Because, I mean, what is one more?  I had made a promise to Camden a few months ago that I needed to fill and it involved Chick-fil-A and fries and Sprite and mounds of  ketchup.  So, we all headed out for lunch at our Chick-fil-A.  Yes, we look like a three ring circus  take up a lot of space in a restaurant, but I was strategic in our arrival time so as not to be there with everyone else in Knoxville during the busiest time.  We all ordered and ate and then it came time to introduce Tyson to his very first fast-food play structure.  Somebody (one of you Momma's out there) please understand that the decibel level inside that enclosed room reached an ALL TIME HIGH around 1pm yesterday.  For anyone close by, please accept my most sincere apologies.  But, here's the thing... you only get firsts once.  The squeals and screams and laughs were music to my ears though I doubt that was the case for the others in there and I sat with a big smile on my face.  Play, Tyson, play. 
Once we arrived home, I was busy cleaning and  doing more laundry reorganizing.  As noted before, I am trying to get things settled, even still.  I saw Hudson, Corbin, and Camden playing upstairs, downstairs, and outside.  I finally found Tyson downstairs working intently with Brycen on making a lego motorcycle (duh).  But, Tyson seemed so sleepy and not himself.  When asked if he wanted a pillow to put his head on, he immediately responded, "yes."  NOT NORMAL.  So, I swept him up in my arms and felt his cheeks.. they seemed cool.  I did the "Mommy drill" and put my hand up the back of his shirt.  FLAMING HOT.  Here goes a first.  But, this time, it was for Mommy AND Tyson.  Just like when your newborn gets sick for the first time, you have no idea what to expect or how he/she will respond.  I immediately felt like a new mom again.  I took his temperature....101.8.  I explained that he had a fever and poured him some Ibuprofen because who has time for Tylenol every 4 hours when Ibuprofen works better and is only given every 6 hours.  HE TOOK IT LIKE A CHAMP.  He curled up on Brycen and was asleep in two minutes flat.  He slept through our dinner (thank you Huffman's) and  finally woke just as we were trying to decide if we should wake him to eat.  For the first time in over a week, I asked him if he wanted injera (Mark had gone by the Ethiopian restaurant yesterday afternoon to get some) and he said, "yes.".  So, I made some shiro like I have been doing it for years.  Thank you, YouTube, you just became my best friend.  Again.  Fortunately, shiro is easy, fast, and we had bought shiro powder and berbere before we left Ethiopia.  Tyson roused enough to walk to the table to EAT IT ALL.  You made me a hero to my kid, YouTube, and I am forever grateful. 
Tyson's fever responded well to Ibuprofen and came down, but at 2am it was right back up and we repeated the medicine routine along with some big gulps of water, because when your momma is a nurse and you are sick BLESS YOUR HEART.  I already had an appointment scheduled for today with the pediatrician to get established and begin getting Tyson caught up on immunizations.  We kept that 11am appointment anyway so we could run his labwork to confirm he has a virus.  His only complaint in the night was a headache, but this morning that complaint was gone. 
He woke with his sweet smile like he does every morning and he gave me big hugs, just like always.  After the big kids left, he said, "Momma, you and me....sleep on couch.  Then your bed."  Big smiles.  I responded, "yes, we did!  I loved it.  I am your mommy and I love taking care of you."  I asked him if he wanted to sit on the couch and read.  He agreed.  I ran and grabbed our "Noah and the Mighty Ark" book as well as our "Jesus Storybook Bible" (THIS IS A MUST FOR ALL YOU PARENTS).  I realized during Bible Fellowship Sunday morning that I didn't think he had ever heard the story of Noah and the ark.  So, I read that one to him and then we opened up the Storybook Bible.  I read with a shaky voice and with eyes burning with tears.  The days and weeks and months I have spent longing to sit, holding him, and read to him about Jesus are too numerous to count.  Despite his not feeling well, here we were.  Curled up on the far left corner of the couch with the recliner out, our feet propped up, and a tan cozy, warm blanket stretched out over us, reading about how the Bible isn't a book (just) about rules or about heroes.  It is, rather, a book about One Hero who came for all mankind and how every story inside it points to Him.  My heart was full as I flipped the colorful pages, his eyes glued to each one.  It was a first and one I know will forever be etched in my mind.
Next, I went to shower because a long night on the couch with a sick child whose fever keeps breaking and Tyson stayed curled up on the couch.  While I was getting ready he came in our bathroom and watched me.  I talked to him about mascara (because mascara and lip gloss are my love languages.  And shoes, but that's for a different day), and hair dryers, and hair straighteners.  Then, he chose what hair products he wanted to use today.  We have an assortment, because I wasn't sure exactly what texture his hair was, so we planned for it all.  That has left us with about 6 of the 10 things that work well.  Obviously, we don't use them all at once, but I let him choose which leave-in conditioner and which hair oil he wanted today.  As I rubbed them through his brown (beautiful) curls, he said, "Momma, at orphanage when sick, alone."  I stopped, stooped down and repeated it to him to make sure I was understanding, "When you were sick in the orphanage you had to stay alone and be by yourself?"  He shook his head yes (which he is doing more and more, rather than just raising his eyebrows).  I went on, "Look at Mommy's eyes.  You do not have to stay alone anymore when you are sick.  Mommy will take care of you and hold you anytime you are sick."  My heart sank on the one hand.  On the other hand, I fought off grateful tears that those days are behind him.  I recounted a few hours before how we had been curled up on the couch and a few hours before that he had been between Mark and me in our bed and a few hours before that he had fallen asleep on Brycen.  All the while, I hadn't given it much thought, but in the middle of fevers, Ibuprofen, and fatigue, Tyson's world was changing.  Again. 
And when I see his world open or change, it changes me, too.  I stood drying my hair praying for sick children all over the world today who are in orphanages and due to lack of caregivers and the desire to not get everyone sick, they are alone in their beds.  I also thanked God that we are able to fill in the gap for those we know and love... that they don't have to suffer alone.  And just like that, we were starting another day of firsts.
We left the bathroom and decided to eat breakfast.  I went for eggs (I started eating them again in Ethiopia or, well, I would've been hungry).  Tyson opted for... wait for it...a banana (surprise!).  But, he had a different request this time.  He has obviously been observing how Hudson often has me cut up his banana in a bowl.  So, this morning, Tyson asked if I would cut his up.  I was happy to.  Then, he said, "Can I eat it with a fork?"  I was already emotional, but this request was so tender to me because Tyson is just learning to eat with a fork.  He was used to a spoon because he ate porridge every morning at the orphanage.  His other foods were all eaten with his hands (remember, no utensils in restaurants in Ethiopia?).  So, using a fork has been all new, and not always easy or fun.  So, today, he asked to eat his banana cut up with a fork.  He used that fork perfectly and declared it to be the best banana he's ever had. 
We were fueled up and ready for the doctor's appointment.  When we arrived to the "Nemo" room, his eyes were looking all around, but he stayed close to me.  I could tell he was unsure about where we were.  The staff was so sweet and kind and THANK GOODNESS for nurse Beth who has an adopted daughter from China.  SHE GETS IT.  She was the first face we saw and she was so sweet and welcoming.  I filled out a blue million pieces of paper  paperwork and had to repeatedly say or write "Unknown."  No, I don't know his birthweight, or if he has a family history of cancer or asthma or heart disease.  No, I don't know what injuries he's had.  I THINK I know he's never had anesthesia.  Paperwork didn't take long, but it was also a startling reminder of his life before us that I know so little about.  And, for an international adoption, we actually know a lot.  However, to look at page after page of questions and realize I DON'T KNOW ANY OF THIS was tough for me.  I want so much to know how much he weighed, if he was born full term, and how old he was when we started walking.  Yet, I find something beautiful in the not knowing.  The mere fact that I can NOT know and still love him fully.  Advocate for him passionately.  Care for him completely.  There is something profound and beautiful in that to me.  That I can look the doctor straight in the face and say, "I don't know," and he can look back and say, "That's ok.  We are going to take the best care of him we can whether we know these things or not."  Thank you, Jesus, for KNOWING ALL OF US (especially knowing all of our sin and rebellion and selfishness) and choosing to care for us.  ALL OF US....emotionally, physically and spiritually. 
I am so thankful (but not nearly so much as Tyson was) that he had his FIRST experience peeing in a cup.  It was a big hit (no pun intended).  That brought a huge smile to his feverish face.  He also had his first hearing screen, which he passed with flying colors and his first CBC, lipids, and lead screenings.  I am so thankful they all came back perfectly (even that pee in a cup!), with a slight decrease in his white count due to the virus that is causing his fever.  Otherwise, as the doctor said, 'I have never seen a child so newly home with no anemia, no problems in their labs, and seemingly, no parasites."  I told him what I say to everyone who remarks about how well he seems to be transitioning, "Thank you Jesus.  It is all prayer."  We are blessed with a pediatrician who has done many mission trips to Africa and agreed with us.  "God just knew to put him with you," he said.  Yes, He did and we are grateful.
So, I am finishing this up just in time to go grab older kids from school.  I think, I will be waking Tyson from another first... his first nap on Mom on this couch while everyone else was at work/school.  I will try to update again in a few days.  Until then, prayers remain and continue for firefighters,, fevers and firsts.  AND RAIN. 

hugs.
carrie