Friday, October 20, 2017

ABC's and 123's

On October 20, 2016 we were exhausted and running on pure adrenaline still struggling with jet lag, so a lazy day around the guesthouse was perfect.  Except, Tyson was still a few miles away at his orphanage, which made us feel like we were still world's apart. So close, yet so far.  If you want to read about that day, you can do that here.  When we arrived at the orphanage around dinner that night, we expected Tyson to be eating, but we, instead, found him waiting at a window for us.  He had been waiting on us all day, expecting us to come sooner. bless. It's so fascinating to look back, because what I know now is his standing waiting on us is so Tyson.  He constantly wants to know what the plan is  prefers knowing what the day holds and who is doing what, when.  So, I now know that particular day had to be especially hard for him and likely caused him unnecessary anxiety, simply over miscommunication and expectations about when we were to arrive.  I mentioned in that original post about Brycen carrying a green soccer ball that day.  It was a soccer ball we had brought with us to play with at the orphanage and then to leave there.  As soon as Tyson saw it,  he wanted to go play, but he mentioned having another one just like it.  I remember telling him that we had given an exact green soccer ball to one of our friends (who worked for Bethany) to bring to his orphanage a year prior when she was visiting Ethiopia for work.  Because Tyson didn't know about us yet, no one could tell him it was from us, but watching him connect the dots was super special.  He knew we had been loving him a long time not sure he will ever fully know and that's ok .  After playing soccer that day we discussed what he had learned at school that day... "eye," "ear," "nose," "tongue", etc.  Then, we watched him sit on the ground in the cutest black pajamas that looked like a fireman uniform writing the alphabet and numbers.  As many of you know, when we arrived home from Ethiopia we had originally thought we would start Tyson at the school our children have gone to for years (we love our Freedom Christian Academy family so much). However, that was going to be an immunization nightmare and the kindergarten teacher was going to be going on maternity leave in February (only 4 weeks after he would've started).  Clearly, these factors were things we had to prayerfully consider and we decided to jump into homeschooling.  I will blog more about this adventure on another post.  For now, I will say that looking back at those sidewalk chalk letters and numbers makes my jaw drop.  I was amazed then at how well he knew the English alphabet and especially how well he knew to write nearly all the letters.  On days that are frustrating in school, I need to look back at the pictures taken ONLY ONE YEAR AGO.  My lower lip is quivering and I'm getting a lump in my throat thinking about how far he has come.  Tyson is not only writing with amazing penmanship, but he is reading on first grade level just beautifully.  It hasn't all come easily, but he loves learning and he enjoys thinking.  In hindsight, his sitting writing those letters and numbers declaring, "I wrote all of this and you did nothing" (to Menge), must've been a masterpiece for him.  He has worked his TAIL END off learning English because it IS a crazy hard language to learn.  He is remarkably smart and a joy to teach.
Other preferences we learned about Tyson that day were that he prefers carbohydrates like potatoes, rice, and noodles.  Some things never change.  Without a doubt his favorite foods are French fries and spaghetti.  Hands down.  We were hopeful upon our return home to change his life by adding cheese to macaroni. However, as it turns out, he doesn't like cheese.  And, it wasn't until the last month that he has eaten and liked a green vegetable.  Once we were home we realized he had never had a salad, green beans, broccoli, cucumbers, asparagus, spinach, etc.  NOTHING GREEN.  He always tried what we were eating, but he could never bring himself to choke it down eat it.  We aren't sure what changed, but about 3 weeks ago he gave broccoli another try and much to our sheer delight, he declared at the dinner table (seemingly as shocked as we were), "Hey!  I like broccoli now!"  and all God's children said, "Amen!"
We also learned, while donned in those adorable black fireman pajamas, that his favorite color was red.  He's six, so this one preference changes on nearly a daily basis.  Today his favorite color is blue, but we are fighting hard for him not to like it with orange something Brycen doesn't help us with as he is a die hard Florida fan. Next, we learned he was afraid of dogs and of being in the dark.  The dog fear was very real and stayed around for the first several months.  Over time he has met the sweetest dogs and his heart has changed.  It was so tender for us to all sit back and watch him hold Finn's leash (our friend Angie visits often and brings her dog, Finn) all around the house.  After watching for 20 minutes Regan said, "Hey buddy, usually you walk the dog around since you are holding the leash. Don't let him walk you around!"  But, Ty didn't seem to mind one bit.  He does, however, still prefer NOT being in the dark.  It isn't a big deal and we all know to never turn the lights off in the basement in the rooms with no windows while he is in there. 
Perhaps the biggest change from one year ago is what Tyson told us that day about swimming.  He told us he thought he would love swimming as long as there wasn't any water because he would "go under and die."  batting away tears YALL.  HE'S THE BEST LITTLE SWIMMER.  He loves it!  He spent as much time over the summer as he possibly could swimming.  He did wear his Puddle Jumper when swimming in the deep end or jumping off the diving board.  But, just before summer came to a halt he was able to jump in the deep and swim to the shallow with no floats or help.  I am so proud of all the fears he has conquered and how he has faced so many new things with bravery and courage. 
One year ago today Mark and I sat together and told Tyson together that we would be his parents forever.  I will never forget his full-faced grin and his leaning in toward us, giving Mark a huge hug, as soon as Menge finished interpreting for us. it wasn't a dream.  it was really happening. 
Perhaps the thing I remember most about one year ago today was feeling Tyson's soft lips on my cheek for the very first time.  My first kiss.  It was a moment that felt like time stood still.  Such a special day of bonding. Tyson loves to brush his teeth before bed, put on fresh pajamas, come to me and say, "can I please lay with you?"  At what point I usually say, "Sure, buddy."  We grab a cozy blanket and he crawls up on my lap and I hold him while he falls asleep.  Little did I know after that little peck on the cheek a year ago, that this little guy was going to be my cuddle bug.  I am still working on teaching him how to really cuddle, because he wasn't held close in his younger years, it is foreign to him how to really curl around someone, get comfortable, and go to sleep (like when you are holding a newborn).  But, we have come a long way.  Those end-of-the-day cuddles are a gift to me.  This is what it's like to have a mommy.  This is what it's like to your baby home.
The truth the Lord was pressing in on me that day is one He is still engraving on my heart today:  these days aren't holy because of our circumstances, we are on sacred sod, walking on holy ground because He is walking with us.  His presence is what changes our days from ordinary to extraordinary, forgettable to unforgettable, temporal to eternal (in the perspective we carry).  As we look forward to what He has for us in the future, we do so with this as our hope: HE WALKS WITH US.  And, as I look back with a heart of gratitude, I am eager to see what He wants to do in the next year.  It's quite supernatural all that has happened, which is as easy to see as, well, your ABC's and 123's.    Jesus, we are yours and we love and trust you. 

Until tomorrow's update,
carrie

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