Sunday, January 29, 2017

catching up

It's been a month since my last post and quite honestly, I am not sure where the time has gone.  Ok, I actually DO know where it has gone...it went through Christmas, then Passion, then back to school, then SNOW, then basketball games, and here we are.  So, I wanted to do a quick catch-up post because so much has happened since my last one. I often say it, but it is as true today as it was the first day we met Tyson: I WANT TO RECORD HIM ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY.  He is so funny and sweet and full of questions curious and thoughtful.  And as a side note (but a very important one), HE IS STILL ROLLING HIS R's AND IT JUST UNDOES ME.  Tyson likes to sleep, which we are so grateful for, as many children struggle to sleep for months once they come into new families.  Not our boy.  He sleeps at least 11 hours at night and he is always the first to fall asleep.  I think we just wear him smack out keep him busy and he crashes.  It's always a blessing to walk into the boys' room after they are asleep and see him tucked between Hudson and Corbin.  Often, Tyson will have one arm (or both) across one brother or the other while he soundly sleeps.  This is the exact point that I gasp, still taken aback that he is here and we get to love him. And, I inevitably get tears in my eyes and say a prayer of thanksgiving.  Being his family has proven to be SO rewarding for us all.  He was literally just made for us. 
Christmas proved to be full of laughs and gratitude. We woke that morning and all hustled down the stairs.  The boys sounded like a herd of cattle barreling down the steps.  I went ahead of them to take pictures and see their faces.  I could hear giggles and gasps as they came down the steps.  They all came into the playroom and found "their" wrapping paper (each had picked out his/her own paper in advance).  My eyes were trying to watch everyone at once, but I think all our eyes were glued on him.  Tyson made his way to his batman wrapping paper and looked diligently through his stocking that was laying on top of his gifts.  He opened and closed his new superheroes umbrella a zillion times and walked around showing everyone his new green piggy bank (thank you, Dollar Tree).  It wasn't until a few minutes later that we realized he didn't understand that the three wrapped gifts under the stocking were also his to open.  He had been perfectly content with the small gifts from his stocking.  Once we gave him the OK to open the others, he tore into them with utter glee.  Typically, we give our kids a want, a need, and a read for Christmas.  So, his want was a Nintendo DS but only so each of the three little boys had their own Mario Kart and we didn't have to listen to more arguing about it so he could play Mario Kart anytime he asked permission without having to wait for his brothers.  Next, he got a need: snow boots.  Believe it or not, he was most excited about those!  Lastly, he got some books and he seemed grateful for it all.  He was equally as excited to see what everyone else got, which was super sweet to see.  His eyes were filled with wonder from our Christmas Eve traditions of getting new pajamas, baking cookies, making gingerbread houses, reading "Twas the Night Before Christmas, " and putting out reindeer food (none of our kids "believe" anymore, but we still keep the traditions alive and we wanted him to experience them).  All five kids slept in one room on Christmas Eve and on Christmas morning they were up and attem in plenty of time to still have a big breakfast, open gifts, and make it to church with time to spare!  The rest of Christmas Day was spent at my parents for lunch and then back home for a big Christmas dinner with the Pinner's and Maygen and Josh (and our sweet Jaxson, of course).  The kids played and played until they were just exhausted.  Throughout the day I had tears sitting in my eyes, so keenly aware of the five prior Christmases.  During communion on Christmas morning my eyes kept making their way to my right where Hudson was taking  communion for the first time and where Tyson sat beside him.  It was a celebration on so many levels.  Throughout the day I would say, "Tyson, Mommy is so glad you are home for Christmas this year."  He would just grin and say, "Ok, Mommy."  And, I would give him a kiss, bat away tears, and whisper a prayer of gratitude to that Christ-child who came and made it all possible. 
As a "together" gift, the kids got a trampoline for Christmas and thankfully, Christmas day was warm enough for them to enjoy it!  Tyson jumped and giggled with all kinds of sheer joy.  I stood in the garage at one point just listening to them all giggling and trying to jump to make each other go higher and higher which beats our bet that we wouldn't make it through the day without going to the ER.  As my head hit the pillow that night I was tearful with gratitude.  Tyson had heard the Christmas story, observed communion, heard the gospel, opened presents, and knew the joy of a surprise gift being opened.  I couldn't thank HIM enough.
Just a few days later, we packed all manner of bags and snacks and headed to Atlanta for Passion Conferences. If you ask any of the Mckeehan kids their favorite part of the entire year there is a high probability you will get more than half who would shout the answer with beaming smiles: PASSION.  It is our 8th year (I think) of spending New Year's in Atlanta as Mark prepares to serve as  a Team Lead for Passion Conferences.  So, we typically pack noise makers, hats, horns, and sparkling cider and make our way to the lobby of our hotel.  We watch with all the other guests as the ball drops and we make a scene and go back to our clean room without a mess to clean up.  It works out well.  This year, we had all talked so much to Tyson about Passion that we weren't sure if he was really excited or just pretending to be to get us all off his back about how he SHOULD be excited about it.  Either way, he joyfully entered the hotel room with us and looked around taking it all in.  It was his first hotel stay.  He had stayed in the guesthouse in Ethiopia, but a hotel stay is quite different.  About the time he finished up asking us all about the room and what all the light switches were for, there was a knock at the door:  the bellhop had arrived with our luggage.  As he walked in, he was carrying Brycen's backpack that said "Ethiopia" and has an Ethiopian flag on it.  The sweet man carried it in and said, "This my country," pointing to the backpack.  I immediately got tears and grabbed Tyson from the adjoining room to introduce him.  I explained we had only been home with him for 6 weeks and we chatted about where he was from, where Tyson was from, and our favorite Ethiopian foods.  We mentioned celebrating Melkam Gena (Ethiopian Christmas, which isn't celebrated until January 7th).  The gentleman was so kind, gentle, and complimentary of Tyson and he stated how grateful he was to have met us.  He spoke Amharic to Tyson, but Tyson simply raised his eyebrows in agreement not speaking any Amharic in response.  I am thankful for the little things and this one interaction meant so much to us. 
New Year's Eve we kept up tradition by celebrating (with the Altom's) in the lobby of the Omni and we let the kids blow horns, scream, and pop noise makers to their heart's content.  Then, we all went back to our rooms and fell into deep sleeps.  We were tired! The next four days were spent visiting the Aquarium (thank you, Mr. Ron, for our tickets!) and we loved having my niece, Megan, joining us this year at Passion.  We weren't sure how Tyson would do and we brought an extra set of hands along since Mark isn't with us most of the time.  It was a fun few days with her and having her help as we navigated walking around Atlanta was so appreciated.  Once the conference started, Tyson sat with wide eyes at first.... 60,000 people all gathered in one place, loud (beautiful) music, lights, etc.  But, he seemed to love it and many of the songs were familiar to him.  I tearfully recorded him singing "Good, Good Father" at one of the sessions as Chris Tomlin led.  Amid all the people, I felt like it was just us.  And this song had become (and HAS become) the anthem of our sweet boy's heart.  I loved that he could sing the words without thinking about it.  Each one seemed to roll off his tongue with ease and he just sang and watched.  I think he was a bit in awe that the man he has listened to sing it a million times before was standing in front of him singing.  I love all the firsts. 
Passion was the perfect start to the year, which I think every single year. But, this year was no exception.  It really was a perfect start.  Brycen took on a great responsibility by sponsoring his first Compassion child (we love you, Juselle).  So, it was a fruitful (in more than one way) experience.  Tyson now joins the other Mckeehan children in LOVING Passion. 
After we arrived back home from Atlanta, it was time to SERIOUSLY get back to a routine. The oldest four started back to school and I started doing homeschool with Tyson.  YALL.  He is so smart.  We are working on five sight words a week, so he is up to knowing 15 sight words and knowing long and short vowel sounds, sounding out many words, and he's a math pro.  It has been such a joy to be able to teach him at home and to listen to him read two sentences to me on Friday.  Later that night I said, "Mark, can you believe we have only had him three months?  He has come so far!"  And, he has.  I still get questions about how he is adjusting and my answer is always the same, "He is just doing great.  It is all the prayer.  Those long years in the wait were so purposed to prepare him specifically for our family."  There are still moments (especially doing school work) when he gets quiet and then starts to cry.  This is always a good time to push school aside and sit and hold each other.  Sometimes he can verbalize why he is crying and other times he can't.  What matters is that I remind him that he is safe, we love him, and we will always take care of him.  In these moments of grief and tears I am brought back to the harsh reminder of all the years without us.  All the years he was navigating the world on his own.  All the days that he may not have been learning in an environment that was safe for him to admit he didn't know an answer.  All the nights he silently cried wondering if he'd get a family.  And, it's rare that he cries alone in those moments.  They don't last long and they don't happen everyday, but when they do, my heart breaks for him.  A new home, new country, new language, new family, new food, new friends, new church, and new rules.  It's a lot to take it.  Overall, he makes it look easy but I know in my heart of hearts nothing about it is easy
Oh!  I forgot to update about his minor dental surgery on December 22.  The rockstar pediatric dentist that we saw (Dr. Jessica Phillips) was able to salvage all of Tyson's teeth (praises!).  He handled anesthesia like a champ!  All in all, it went flawlessly and we are grateful to have that first behind us. 
Our first Sunday back to church after the New Year, I stayed with Tyson for Sunday night EKG (our kids programming on Sunday nights) because he had never gone to a Sunday night before.  I knew it would be an unfamiliar routine and a new teacher, so I stayed with him to ensure he would be ok.  I was just fine watching him participate in the game reciting books of the bible and having his snack.  I was even fine walking to music with him.  What I wasn't prepared for was sitting right behind Tyson and Hudson as they were introduced to the Lincoln Brewster song, "Majestic," with motions.  Watching Tyson raise his hands in praise and singing, "The heavens declare your greatness, The oceans cry out to you, The mountains, they bow down before you, so I'll join with the earth and I'll give my praise to YOU."
I stood watching his right arm raise and then his left and I cried.  I am grateful the music leaders didn't acknowledge my sobs in the back of the room, but when you get glimpses of SHEER REDEMPTION it's just too much to keep inside.  Tyson has jumped right into our church schedule like he's always been here.  His bible fellowship leaders (we love you Jason and Emily!) and all the Children's Church workers have been THE BEST to welcome him without making him feel like he's a petting zoo overwhelmed.  Just the other morning Corbin was getting ready for school and he said, "Mom, I talked to Tyson about becoming a Christian after we went to bed last night.  I told him if he had questions or when he was ready to come to me or you or dad."  Um, ok.  I will go cry again now, thankyouverymuch.  We really do have THE best leaders leading our kids to know and understand and follow Holy Spirit, even at an early age.  It has literally made all the difference.  When the kids do their worship night in the spring and he stands on the stage singing, praising, and raising those arms, I will likely be the mom smiling through tears.  Some things in a heart you just can't express with human words.
What happened next?  Oh!!  I know... first snow!!!  My goodness gracious.  We have talked the last few years about what it would be like for him to see and experience his first snow.  So, it was a bit surreal to be putting on layer after layer and to see his face full of expectation and delight.  He giggled and squealed and carried on THE WHOLE DAY.  Brycen taught him how to sled and unfortunately, we didn't have a good snow for a snowman or snowballs, but he got the idea.  And, when everyone would come in to get warm it he wanted to keep all his layers on, even the wet ones, so that the second someone said they wanted to go back out, he was ready to go!  I don't think he loved how much time it took to get ready to go out.  He became a pro at downing hot chocolate and putting on gloves....something that isn't easy to learn!  And, it turns out those snow boots for Christmas came in quite handy!
A few other firsts have been his first paper airplane, playing his first recorder (we made a "family band" with the Bayne's and it was so loud a joyful noise), his first car wash (please see the video on my Instagram feed), first trip to Dollywood, and first coffee ceremony in America!  We did celebrate Melkam Gena with the McAffry's (we love you people so big).  Their son, Johnny, has been home from Ethiopia 18 months, and we planned to celebrate Ethiopian Christmas together months ago.  We had it all set for January 7th and then it snowed, so we pushed it to the 14th.  We enjoyed traditional Ethiopian food and a coffee ceremony where we took turns roasting beans and letting the kids grind the beans by hand.  We did, I will confess, grind the majority of the beans in our grinder because who has that kind of time and strength? No one in America who isn't used to doing it! we didn't want to be grinding all night and not enjoying freshly roasted beans!  I wore my traditional white Ethiopian dress so I could serve everyone (traditionally the one serving the coffee ceremony is wearing white).  We put our grass down (uh hum, our grass skirt from Party City worked like a charm) and we used our jebena to pour the coffee into the small white, traditionally painted handleless cups.  The kids loved it as much as the adults. Johnny and Tyson both gave us raised eyebrows of approval. 
The next week as we were doing school I was explaining rhyming words and somehow the word kangaroo came up.  Tyson looked at me like I had two heads and so I asked, "Have you ever heard of a kangaroo?"  He shook his head no.  I pushed school aside and began to inquire, "How about a walrus? (no), a rhinoceros? (no, but he loved the name!), a penguin? (no), a baboon?  (no),  a meerkat? (no), a Panda? (no)"  the list went on and on.  So, I pulled out my handy-dandy YouTube and we sat watching various animals in the wild.  This prompted great conversation about the creativity of God and how He made each animal.  So, later that week I took Tyson to the zoo for the first time (thank you, Dana, for getting us in!).  He loved it!  His favorite animals were the lions and tigers, but he loved the gorillas and gibbons, too.  Seeing things through his eyes is just pure joy. 
One day this week I was talking to him about our upcoming Disney trip (we were supposed to go in the fall, thinking he would've already been home several months, but we ended up being in Africa.  Some thoughtful friends told us over a year ago they wanted to gift us with a place to stay for our first family vacation once he was home.  We couldn't do it without this gift.  SO GRATEFUL).  I want to try hard to prepare Tyson for new things as much as possible, so I was thinking through what we would see and do.  I explained about seeing characters, staying in another hotel, a lot of walking, rides, and then it hit me: I bet he's never seen fireworks.  I asked him and he said he had never heard of them.  THANK YOU, AGAIN, YOUTUBE.  We watched firework show after firework show and he just loved it.  He knows to expect them to be loud and I literally can't wait to see him at Disney meeting Buzz and Woody experiencing all of it for the first time.  Magical indeed. The last time we were at Disney as we walked out of the Magic Kingdom on our last night I said, "next time we come, we will be a family of seven."  The thoughts of going last fall without him was nearly too much for me to take.  So, when the timing didn't work out for us to go, I was somewhat relieved.  Walking in this time will be another first, but also a full circle moment for me, personally.  Being there last time was hard, knowing we weren't all there and constantly wondering what he would think about it.  This time we will know and I can't wait to let him be a kid in the happiest place on earth.
I know this has been long and if you are still reading BLESS YOU.  I have good intentions to blog more often, but sometimes time just gets away from me.  I am constantly thinking about you when we go throughout our days so I can remember what to tell you.  I will leave you with one funny story (there are a million) that happened last week.  Tyson never wants water or food to be really hot or really cold.  He just prefers lukewarm.  So, he proudly walked out of the bathroom after washing his hands saying, "Mommy, Mommy, I just used burn water!"  Tickled, I replied, "I am so proud of you for using hot water, buddy!"  I just love him to no end.
As we head out the door for church I am looking at our three youngest boys dressed in their Christmas pajamas (Tyson:  Buzz Lightyear, Hudson: BB8, Corbin: classic Mickey characters) for pj night in EKG.  It continues to be the little things that leave me the most undone.  Watching them in their pj's play and help each other find and put on jackets.  It's family. And, as we continue to settle into being a family of seven, nothing means more than to hear Tyson say, "I love my family."  We love you, too, sweet boy.  We love you, too."  Jesus, we love you for showing us what family looks like.  For making a way for us, as the foreigner, to know you and to be adopted into your family, having full rights as heirs to your kingdom.  Everything we do is for You, to You, from You, by You, through You.  We give you praise. 

grateful.
carrie


2 comments:

  1. Absolutely love it... I love you and your family beyond words... you all mean so much to me... Tyson always puts a smile on my face when he walks thru waffle houses door Hello Mrs. June ... but all of you make my day...Truly a blessing to have Met you all almost 4 years ago... and to know I can't leave my job because I'll have a few upset children makes my heart smile to know I'm that loved and wanted.. who would have thought being a waffle house server could Gain such and Amazing family like YOURS.... much love to you

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  2. We love you, Mrs. June (so much). You have been our sheer delight- the blessing of our friendship is all ours. Thanks for serving us so well (not just at Waffle House) in how you love us & pray for us. See you Wednesday morning!!

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