Well, our house has been busy the past few days as Mark and I prepare to leave for Passion: Ft. Worth tomorrow. The weekend was full of laundry, packing, writing notes for all the childcare help, organizing thoughts/stuff/ more stuff. And, then Monday was a continuation of the busyness, except with one big difference: Our final home study visit!!!! We were thrilled to have our social worker here to meet our kids, see our home, and get to know us in our environment. We started our home study interviews on Thursday (my individual meeting), then Friday (our couple interview and Mark's individual), and then, finally, Monday's visit in our home. At the end of my visit on Thursday, our social worker asked me what states I have lived in since I turned 18. I simply answered, "North Carolina," she typed on her computer and then had me fill out a section of my back ground check for North Carolina. She was gonna complete the rest of the form. Mark did the same thing on Friday after noon (late afternoon, like 4 pm). Just before she left her office Monday to come to our house, the social worker said she walked by the fax machine as something was coming through. Then, she realized it was from North Carolina. She said, "I thought to myself, 'I must have omitted something and they need clarification.' Then I realized it was your completed back ground checks. I have never had back ground checks come back that fast." I had to smile and say, "I am not surprised. That is what we are praying for."
It's in the little things I am learning to see Him and learning to just say, "Not surprised." He is hearing, He is answering, He is making a way. We are so, so grateful and humbled.
Once our home study is typed up and completed by the social worker we will apply for the immigration approval, fingerprinting, etc. Thanks for journeying with us. We will keep you updated as things progress. You being with us along way has made it so much sweeter. It is one of the unexpected blessings for us, one no one could have prepared us for. Then, again, I think about how He has crafted us to be His body, His Plan A. When I think about that I have to shrug and say, "Not surprised." We love you.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Tangible
What a difference two weeks makes.
As we have journeyed the last two weeks from hearing about MOWA's plans to only view 5 cases per day as opposed to the previous 50-60 cases per day, our emotions have wavered from fear, sadness, & grief to hope, joy, & peace. It's like riding some kind of crazy roller coaster that you are unfamiliar with. Blind-folded. But, here we are. Overwhelmingly grateful to be on the roller coaster, deep valleys and all. We only received official confirmation from our agency yesterday that MOWA is now seeing 20 cases per day! Praises! It isn't back to 100%, but nearing 50% sure is better than the previous 90% decrease. We are overjoyed and thankful. God is answering our prayers and I do not believe it would be happening without them. The MOWA office did fire their previous personnel and now have a new director and all new personnel. The new staff seems to be willing to work with the US State Dept, other governments around the world, and agencies to resolve the corruption without such a drastic decrease in case load. For about 10 days we were in a "wait and see" mode. Just waiting and "watching" what was actually happening in adoption cases from Ethiopia. Two weeks ago tomorrow I was emotional all day, knowing if I had one quiet second alone I would have burst into tears all over the place. And I did a few times. I was so sad, fearing we would have to wait years to hold our daughter, but knowing it was all in God's timing. The human in me was just really, really sad. I was crying for orphans who would be left to the streets without the revenue from international adoptions to keep their orphanages open. That night I decided to shower late after the kids had gone to bed. In the shower, I sat down and prayed aloud, asking God to heal my heart and to give me the courage to trust Him. No matter what. Over and over I pleaded and said, "I trust You with my family." Over and over He was faithful to whisper in my spirit, "I know her, Carrie, and she is worth it. No matter what the next few months look like. She is worth the wait. I see her even now." The more He spoke to me, the more I trusted and believed Him.
When I woke the next morning, I was choosing hope and praise. I led stay-at-home-Mom's bible study that morning and chose not read any emails or internet updates until Bible study was over. When I opened my email and read that MOWA had only seen 5 cases that day, I began to cry. I was so grateful to have a few friends still here who loved on Sharon (also adopting from Ethiopia) and I. Through out the day I would audibly say, "I am putting my hope in You, Lord" more to get my heart and mind focused on Him than anything. Reminding myself that His timing is perfect, He sees all, He knows all, and His ways are full of purpose. That night our family went to IHOP for dinner, I wasn't up to cooking. I was hesitant all afternoon, waiting for Brycen or Regan to ask me if I had "talked to Ethiopia yet." That morning they woke up, knowing it was a big decision day in Ethiopia, and asked if we could pray for the people making decisions. Their involvement and encouragement are such a bright spot on this journey. I was grateful, however, they didn't ask me about it right after school. I wasn't sure I could drive and explain in effectively. I really wanted to be able to sit and talk to them about God's timing and trusting in Him, etc. That night at IHOP Regan and I went to the ladies room. While she was washing her hands she looked up at me and said, "Oh, Mom, I meant to ask you if you talked to Ethiopia today." Gulp. I replied, "Yes, Sweetie, I did. Listen, " (and I squatted down to get on eye level with her), "Ethiopia is slowing down how many adoptions they are doing. By a lot. So, it is just going to take a lot longer to get a sister than we originally thought." Wide-eyed she replied, "But, I can still get a brown sister, right?" "Yes," I said, "it is just going to take a while. Do you understand?" She turned and reached for a paper towel and began drying her hands. As she opened the door she looked back and said, "Yes. She will be worth the wait."
Tangible.
I could hardly get myself back to the table. The way God loves us overwhelms me sometimes. I was so in awe of Him, right there in the IHOP bathroom! He knew I needed something tangible to know He had heard our hearts' cries. The very words He had whispered to me the night before my six year old just spoke audibly. Sigh. He is so good to us, fighting our battles for us and protecting us along the way.
Needless to say, I replayed that bathroom conversation over and over in my mind about a million times over the next week when things were still in chaos and when scheduled meetings to give concrete answers were repeatedly cancelled. It was becoming more and more clear that putting my Hope in anything other than Him would prove inconsistent, unreliable, and temporary. But, as the days pressed on, the news got better and better.
It came to a huge mountain-top for us Thursday. In the middle of all of the unknowns, I was feeling like we may never get started on our home study or our next batch of paper work. I had taken the kids to the park Thursday to play and when I got back into the car I realized I had missed a call. When I listened to the voicemail, tears fell. It was our social worker from our agency wanting to start our home study! I initially thought the home study would take about a month. It is one visit alone with me, one alone with Mark, one with us together, and then one at our home. When I called back to give our available days, she said, "How about let's do your interview alone Thursday, then Friday you and Mark come in together and then I will do his after we finish with the two of you together." What? 3 of the 4 visits in 2 days? Yes. Our God is tangible. We are hoping to have our final home visit at the beginning of next week (before we leave for Passion: Ft. Worth) or at the beginning of the following week. From the latest information we have received this week it seems that our process will go "as normal" from now until we get our referral (so we need to do immigration paper work/fingerprinting, finish up our dossier, get it all authenticated at the state and federal levels, send it to Ethiopia, and wait). Once the Ethiopian government receives all of our paper work they will match us with a little girl. After we receive her information we wait a few months and go to "court." We will go to court in Ethiopia (this is the process where she becomes a McKeehan!) and we will be able to meet her and spend a few hours a day with her while we are there. Then, we will return home. This is where the new changes will likely cause a delay. Currently, there are about 5-6 weeks between your court date and your embassy appointment (when you travel back to Ethiopia and she becomes a US citizen and is able to enter our country and come to live with us!). The chances are, the time frame from court to embassy will at least double ( on the fast end). Rather than focusing on that, we are so excited to be getting our home study completed and to get on with the good stuff, without worrying and focusing on the negative stuff.
We are so honored and humbled to have you journeying with us. Our hearts are often in awe over the gratitude and support so many have offered us. Above all, we are humbled and brought to our knees with arms raised high at the faithfulness of our God. He is good. He is purposed. He is Sovereign. And in this season, I am so thankful
He is tangible.
As we have journeyed the last two weeks from hearing about MOWA's plans to only view 5 cases per day as opposed to the previous 50-60 cases per day, our emotions have wavered from fear, sadness, & grief to hope, joy, & peace. It's like riding some kind of crazy roller coaster that you are unfamiliar with. Blind-folded. But, here we are. Overwhelmingly grateful to be on the roller coaster, deep valleys and all. We only received official confirmation from our agency yesterday that MOWA is now seeing 20 cases per day! Praises! It isn't back to 100%, but nearing 50% sure is better than the previous 90% decrease. We are overjoyed and thankful. God is answering our prayers and I do not believe it would be happening without them. The MOWA office did fire their previous personnel and now have a new director and all new personnel. The new staff seems to be willing to work with the US State Dept, other governments around the world, and agencies to resolve the corruption without such a drastic decrease in case load. For about 10 days we were in a "wait and see" mode. Just waiting and "watching" what was actually happening in adoption cases from Ethiopia. Two weeks ago tomorrow I was emotional all day, knowing if I had one quiet second alone I would have burst into tears all over the place. And I did a few times. I was so sad, fearing we would have to wait years to hold our daughter, but knowing it was all in God's timing. The human in me was just really, really sad. I was crying for orphans who would be left to the streets without the revenue from international adoptions to keep their orphanages open. That night I decided to shower late after the kids had gone to bed. In the shower, I sat down and prayed aloud, asking God to heal my heart and to give me the courage to trust Him. No matter what. Over and over I pleaded and said, "I trust You with my family." Over and over He was faithful to whisper in my spirit, "I know her, Carrie, and she is worth it. No matter what the next few months look like. She is worth the wait. I see her even now." The more He spoke to me, the more I trusted and believed Him.
When I woke the next morning, I was choosing hope and praise. I led stay-at-home-Mom's bible study that morning and chose not read any emails or internet updates until Bible study was over. When I opened my email and read that MOWA had only seen 5 cases that day, I began to cry. I was so grateful to have a few friends still here who loved on Sharon (also adopting from Ethiopia) and I. Through out the day I would audibly say, "I am putting my hope in You, Lord" more to get my heart and mind focused on Him than anything. Reminding myself that His timing is perfect, He sees all, He knows all, and His ways are full of purpose. That night our family went to IHOP for dinner, I wasn't up to cooking. I was hesitant all afternoon, waiting for Brycen or Regan to ask me if I had "talked to Ethiopia yet." That morning they woke up, knowing it was a big decision day in Ethiopia, and asked if we could pray for the people making decisions. Their involvement and encouragement are such a bright spot on this journey. I was grateful, however, they didn't ask me about it right after school. I wasn't sure I could drive and explain in effectively. I really wanted to be able to sit and talk to them about God's timing and trusting in Him, etc. That night at IHOP Regan and I went to the ladies room. While she was washing her hands she looked up at me and said, "Oh, Mom, I meant to ask you if you talked to Ethiopia today." Gulp. I replied, "Yes, Sweetie, I did. Listen, " (and I squatted down to get on eye level with her), "Ethiopia is slowing down how many adoptions they are doing. By a lot. So, it is just going to take a lot longer to get a sister than we originally thought." Wide-eyed she replied, "But, I can still get a brown sister, right?" "Yes," I said, "it is just going to take a while. Do you understand?" She turned and reached for a paper towel and began drying her hands. As she opened the door she looked back and said, "Yes. She will be worth the wait."
Tangible.
I could hardly get myself back to the table. The way God loves us overwhelms me sometimes. I was so in awe of Him, right there in the IHOP bathroom! He knew I needed something tangible to know He had heard our hearts' cries. The very words He had whispered to me the night before my six year old just spoke audibly. Sigh. He is so good to us, fighting our battles for us and protecting us along the way.
Needless to say, I replayed that bathroom conversation over and over in my mind about a million times over the next week when things were still in chaos and when scheduled meetings to give concrete answers were repeatedly cancelled. It was becoming more and more clear that putting my Hope in anything other than Him would prove inconsistent, unreliable, and temporary. But, as the days pressed on, the news got better and better.
It came to a huge mountain-top for us Thursday. In the middle of all of the unknowns, I was feeling like we may never get started on our home study or our next batch of paper work. I had taken the kids to the park Thursday to play and when I got back into the car I realized I had missed a call. When I listened to the voicemail, tears fell. It was our social worker from our agency wanting to start our home study! I initially thought the home study would take about a month. It is one visit alone with me, one alone with Mark, one with us together, and then one at our home. When I called back to give our available days, she said, "How about let's do your interview alone Thursday, then Friday you and Mark come in together and then I will do his after we finish with the two of you together." What? 3 of the 4 visits in 2 days? Yes. Our God is tangible. We are hoping to have our final home visit at the beginning of next week (before we leave for Passion: Ft. Worth) or at the beginning of the following week. From the latest information we have received this week it seems that our process will go "as normal" from now until we get our referral (so we need to do immigration paper work/fingerprinting, finish up our dossier, get it all authenticated at the state and federal levels, send it to Ethiopia, and wait). Once the Ethiopian government receives all of our paper work they will match us with a little girl. After we receive her information we wait a few months and go to "court." We will go to court in Ethiopia (this is the process where she becomes a McKeehan!) and we will be able to meet her and spend a few hours a day with her while we are there. Then, we will return home. This is where the new changes will likely cause a delay. Currently, there are about 5-6 weeks between your court date and your embassy appointment (when you travel back to Ethiopia and she becomes a US citizen and is able to enter our country and come to live with us!). The chances are, the time frame from court to embassy will at least double ( on the fast end). Rather than focusing on that, we are so excited to be getting our home study completed and to get on with the good stuff, without worrying and focusing on the negative stuff.
We are so honored and humbled to have you journeying with us. Our hearts are often in awe over the gratitude and support so many have offered us. Above all, we are humbled and brought to our knees with arms raised high at the faithfulness of our God. He is good. He is purposed. He is Sovereign. And in this season, I am so thankful
He is tangible.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Shaping Worries into Prayers
Update:
I'm choosing Hope.
The news out of Ethiopia wasn't what we wanted. In fact, they did enforce a 90% decrease in cases heard at MOWA today. The response from our agency indicated that the Ethiopian government, as well as many other governments (including the US), are opposed to this plan and decision. The response also suggests that MOWA personnel is all new and there is a hope that the new leadership there will find a way to effectively communicate and put an end to this "looming crisis." I'm not doubting God's call, His plan, His way, or His will. I fully trust Him. I am, however, really sad. Heart-broken. Not just for what this could mean for our family ( a super long wait), but more for all the children living in Ethiopian orphanages who will soon be put on the streets from a 90% decrease in funding to orphanages. God has a heart to fight for the orphan and to make a way for them at all cost. I trust that today. I'm choosing to believe He will change the hearts and minds of those decision-makers and make this change temporary. I'm choosing Hope.
Thank you for your continued prayers. You have no idea how grateful we are for them. We are grieving, but continuing to fight for our daughter. She has never felt as far away as she does today, but I know the One who sees her, knows her, loves her, made her, and is fighting for her.
Psalm 56:8 (from the Message):
You've kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights,
Each tear you entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book
So grateful He fights our battles for us.
I'm choosing Hope.
Original post:
Easier said than done.
That pretty much sums up so much of our lives right now regarding adoption. Waiting. It is an innate part of the adoption journey on a million levels and knowing God's timing is perfect is always in the forefront of my mind. However, it is easier said than done. Anxiety. It, too, can be part of the process considering all of the unknowns and dependence on so many other people. Believing and claiming Philippians 4:6 (from the Message): Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns.
Easier said than done.
I am trying to focus on those words, "Shape your worries into prayers." As some of you know (and others have just seen facebook posts), tomorrow is a crucial day in the vitality and future of adoptions in Ethiopia. MOWA (Ministry of Women's Affairs) plays a large role in finalizing adoptions on the Ethiopian side of things... meaning without a MOWA letter of approval, you don't pass court, and therefore don't adopt. The MOWA office is making an announcement of some sort tomorrow (March 10) regarding rumors that starting tomorrow they are only going to hear 5 international adoption cases a day rather than the 40-50 per day they have been hearing. 90% decrease. Sigh. In an effort to decrease corruption and rampant unethical practices involved in Ethiopian adoptions recently, the government is trying to do more thorough investigations of each case. For that, I am grateful. However, there are other plans out there to decrease this corruption and increase investigations without the 90% decrease. From what I understand there is still division among the Ethiopian government as to the best approach for monitoring/investigating each case. In all reality, the orphanages and a large sector of governmental jobs would be devastated by this decrease, being unable to survive without the revenue that adoptions give. This decrease, most importantly, would leave hundreds of thousands of orphans currently living in orphanages completely homeless.
Focus on, "Shape your worries into prayers."
If you are reading this and are willing, please commit to prayer tonight and in the morning for decision-makers in Ethiopia, the government officials, and these affected children. Please pray for wisdom, discernment, and clarity for those deciding whether or not to enforce this 90% decrease in adoptions. With all my heart, I believe and know God is passionate about caring for orphans and always making a way for them. I am grateful He already knows the outcome. As I lean into Him and the truth of His sovereignty, I would love you to join me (us) in prayer.
Focus on, "Shape your worries into prayers."
I will keep you posted on what news we hear... our agency has people "on the ground" in Ethiopia at the MOWA office trying to get to the bottom of what is going on. Please pray for our family as we seek comfort in knowing He sees, He knows, He cares, He fights our battles for us. Deep Sigh. Seeking to move to a place where it isn't easier said than done. Thanks for loving on us and being supportive. We are honored and thankful to be on this road.... So, so thankful.
"Instead of worrying, pray."
I'm choosing Hope.
The news out of Ethiopia wasn't what we wanted. In fact, they did enforce a 90% decrease in cases heard at MOWA today. The response from our agency indicated that the Ethiopian government, as well as many other governments (including the US), are opposed to this plan and decision. The response also suggests that MOWA personnel is all new and there is a hope that the new leadership there will find a way to effectively communicate and put an end to this "looming crisis." I'm not doubting God's call, His plan, His way, or His will. I fully trust Him. I am, however, really sad. Heart-broken. Not just for what this could mean for our family ( a super long wait), but more for all the children living in Ethiopian orphanages who will soon be put on the streets from a 90% decrease in funding to orphanages. God has a heart to fight for the orphan and to make a way for them at all cost. I trust that today. I'm choosing to believe He will change the hearts and minds of those decision-makers and make this change temporary. I'm choosing Hope.
Thank you for your continued prayers. You have no idea how grateful we are for them. We are grieving, but continuing to fight for our daughter. She has never felt as far away as she does today, but I know the One who sees her, knows her, loves her, made her, and is fighting for her.
Psalm 56:8 (from the Message):
You've kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights,
Each tear you entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book
So grateful He fights our battles for us.
I'm choosing Hope.
Original post:
Easier said than done.
That pretty much sums up so much of our lives right now regarding adoption. Waiting. It is an innate part of the adoption journey on a million levels and knowing God's timing is perfect is always in the forefront of my mind. However, it is easier said than done. Anxiety. It, too, can be part of the process considering all of the unknowns and dependence on so many other people. Believing and claiming Philippians 4:6 (from the Message): Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns.
Easier said than done.
I am trying to focus on those words, "Shape your worries into prayers." As some of you know (and others have just seen facebook posts), tomorrow is a crucial day in the vitality and future of adoptions in Ethiopia. MOWA (Ministry of Women's Affairs) plays a large role in finalizing adoptions on the Ethiopian side of things... meaning without a MOWA letter of approval, you don't pass court, and therefore don't adopt. The MOWA office is making an announcement of some sort tomorrow (March 10) regarding rumors that starting tomorrow they are only going to hear 5 international adoption cases a day rather than the 40-50 per day they have been hearing. 90% decrease. Sigh. In an effort to decrease corruption and rampant unethical practices involved in Ethiopian adoptions recently, the government is trying to do more thorough investigations of each case. For that, I am grateful. However, there are other plans out there to decrease this corruption and increase investigations without the 90% decrease. From what I understand there is still division among the Ethiopian government as to the best approach for monitoring/investigating each case. In all reality, the orphanages and a large sector of governmental jobs would be devastated by this decrease, being unable to survive without the revenue that adoptions give. This decrease, most importantly, would leave hundreds of thousands of orphans currently living in orphanages completely homeless.
Focus on, "Shape your worries into prayers."
If you are reading this and are willing, please commit to prayer tonight and in the morning for decision-makers in Ethiopia, the government officials, and these affected children. Please pray for wisdom, discernment, and clarity for those deciding whether or not to enforce this 90% decrease in adoptions. With all my heart, I believe and know God is passionate about caring for orphans and always making a way for them. I am grateful He already knows the outcome. As I lean into Him and the truth of His sovereignty, I would love you to join me (us) in prayer.
Focus on, "Shape your worries into prayers."
I will keep you posted on what news we hear... our agency has people "on the ground" in Ethiopia at the MOWA office trying to get to the bottom of what is going on. Please pray for our family as we seek comfort in knowing He sees, He knows, He cares, He fights our battles for us. Deep Sigh. Seeking to move to a place where it isn't easier said than done. Thanks for loving on us and being supportive. We are honored and thankful to be on this road.... So, so thankful.
"Instead of worrying, pray."
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